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zen
milady_j
my lj and your lj sitting by the fire...
Recent Entries 
6th-May-2014 07:24 am - Big Birthday Hugs!!
zen
Happy Birthday Scott.
22nd-Apr-2013 02:54 pm - about a Mentor..
zen
Never have I so wanted a Female mentor/role-model than I do after this weekend. 'A' does a decent job of guiding, and giving advice..being reasonably supportive too. I just found, this weekend, how much more valuable it is, psychological-wise, having another woman to look to for advice and experience regarding the martial aspects of our hobby.

I am not looking to replace "A", not at all. I would just like to have the benefit of a female fighter who has been in the game a lot longer than I, one whom I can look to for womanly path on the road to Knightly things.
zen
We woke in the hotel at 7am on Monday morning after Ursulmas, me in my fucking uncomfortable cot, and the boys in their respective beds and the first thing Sir A. says after, "we might as well get going" is "..and you need to see someone about your sleep apnea" directed at me.

I have to say, I was sick with a hella respiratory cold in mid January, recovering mostly but still suffering some effects at Ursulmas. Something that can ascerbate sleep apnea. But it clicked then, why the big sighs when I woke several times between 5a-7am,it clicked when I realized why I had headaches waking up, it clicked when I realized some of my...lack of focus and *squirrel/pothole* trains of thought would go out the window halfway through a story...

So when I did some digging on the subject, it caused me to start thinking about things and that that explained a whole lot about me over the last decade or so and my quality of life.

I downloaded an app to monitor my sleep but it's not too reliable if there are other noises in the room, or other sleepers. So I booked an appointment with the Dr for Friday to get a referral to a sleep clinic to see just how serious this case is.

Is it the critical kick in the pants to lose weight? I would like to say yea, but I still want that chocolate bar and bag of chips and chocolate cake and...so on. I need to figure a way of losing weight that is sustainable(because losing weight is going to help some) It will go better on my heart and body and memory and intelligence and sleep...if I can. But..will that do it? Hopefully the doc can shed some more solutions than the interwebs and friend's advice.
23rd-Nov-2012 07:46 am - once done, it cannot be undone
zen
I just CAN'T put this on FB...too many fragile persons..but you feel free to share as. you will.

please don't hate me..

http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=tDgS6qLsVM4&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DtDgS6qLsVM4
</lj-embed>

bet you can't help but giggle...
17th-Nov-2011 09:40 am - Non Consentual Russian Roulette
zen
So it's been a revolving door of soreness, illness and injury, with very little in fact acquired by fighting, but all the same it is AFFECTING my fighting.

For the past month I've been dicking about with Tennis Elbow in my right elbow(sword arm) and it's not seeming to get any better. Lastnight I only made it through two fights, one with Wernar where I couldn't keep my sword from flopping all over the place when he struck it, I had no grip to speak of and I finally had to just try and work on my defense and punchblocking instead of attempting to throw(spagetti) shots. Then after taping my elbow in a figure eight, to limit full extension of my elbow, my arms are so soft that the tape had to be so tight that by the time I finished my second fight with John the Unkempt it was painful to just do nothing. While S helped take off the tape, i found myself almost hyperventilating with a kind of pained panic. It's a mark that I realized what was happening before S had to remind me to slow my breathing. And the detaping itself hurt. And the blood coming back into that area hurt. And...

I really hate this feeling of weakness. I AM trying to get fitter, it's a slow dedicated process that I fear is not quite (fast or determined) enough. I am by all accounts doing better at practices these days, or Aiden wouldn't have tapped me, but in my current frustrated state I have this reflex worry of not living up, or making forward momentum.

So for the next week I am not going to fight. I will likely be at practice, studying my opponents(a new thing Aiden has set me to doing) and this also might be a good time to drag in my pell from the garage and practice lefthanded for a while. And hopefully by giving my elbow a break I'll be in better condition to fight at Coronet. Plans are good.

On related matters, I've been watching this show, which is kind of inspirational. And started reading this book, which is a very interesting read so far. And was recommended this article to read by my security guard here at work, while we talked about my complaints above. It's a nice article, I wish...no. Am leaving this on a high note.
10th-Nov-2011 11:12 am - A Black belt
zen
The horizon has just gotten a wee bit closer, and now I've a decision, one most precipitously timed.

For that instinct(?), among some important others, I have decided to accept the Honour. For to do less would be a step back I just cannot take. It truely is an all or nothing decision, so my soul searching up to yesterday has revealed.

It' a good fit.
8th-Sep-2011 05:20 pm - Parliament Remembers
zen
It is near dark in the Sanctuary but there is a tiny glimmer of light from the stars that falls on the pine needles high in the trees. A soft wind rustles through the branches and sweeps across the tiny glade below. And far off across the tree tops shines a faint glow of light, dome-like over the city of London.
 
A single rustle breaks nature’s silence in the Sanctuary glade with another closely following it. And another. The sound escalates, and, illuminated by filtered starlight, here and there a flash of silvered wings…They are here.
 
A vortex of small, medium and large winged creatures blackens the airspace inside the ring of trees. Then, just as quickly as it started, the winged creatures, the Owls, separate and alight in the trees that ring the glade.
 
For nearly an hour, all is still and silent. The stars shift minutely, shadows change and coalesce. Two feint figures begin to take shape out of Shadows and Dust and embrace, all eyes widen, if that’s possible, and feathers fluff in response.
 
There.
 
The Parliament takes wing, gliding toward the center of the glade, seemingly on a collision course with the figures. As one they wheel, and a vortex of feathered bodies encircle the two lovers. Once human, once vampire, now only so much memory.
 
The silent column turns with the stars, an entity of wisdom slowing time. The lovers embrace deepens for the moment they are granted. Then, they separate only enough that they may each reach out as one to touch the inner circle in silent reverie. The lovers fingers brush the feathered tips of wings that were once considered friends.
 
Three times the column turns and on the third turn, the Parliament clusters so close that all may touch the lovers forms for just one moment. And then it breaks. In a silent flurry, the owls depart in all directions through and over the trees marking the edge of the glade.
 
The lovers are gone. A soft wind rustles through the branches and sweeps across the tiny glade. Far off across the tree tops shines a faint glow of light, dome-like over the city of London.
12th-Feb-2010 10:12 pm(no subject)
zen
THAT was the Olympic Spirit's *nod* to the Missing Man!

Awesome!
29th-Dec-2009 08:31 am(no subject)
zen
Coffee and glazed donuts from 97st Italian Bakery. MMMmmmmm...
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